Perfectionism: Good vs. Bad

Before we discuss ways to overcome perfectionism we must differentiate between good and bad traits. Unhappy perfectionist feel badly about themselves when they fail to reach unrealistic goals. Failure exacerbates their low self-esteem. They feel that people won't like them unless they are perfect and view failure as a sign of personal defects. They don't learn from mistakes, they fear mistakes. 

Highly successful perfectionists pursue excellence without allowing failure to compromise their self esteem. Although they desire perfect outcomes they don't feel badly about themselves if things don't work out the way they planned. In addition, good perfectionists derive pleasure from their efforts. As poet Robert Frost suggested they enjoy the "pleasure of taking pains." Thirdly, healthy perfectionists learn from mistakes and use imperfect outcomes as an incentive to work harder.